In recent decades, more women have been child-free by choice, whether it’s for lifestyle, financial, or personal reasons. And that’s their prerogative; no one should feel pressured (or forced) into procreating. But one Australian woman lives with a pathological fear of pregnancy and childbirth called tokophobia—and she’s vowed to never conceive because of it.
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It’s worth noting that the majority of pregnant people feel anxious or worried about some aspect of pregnancy and childbirth. But people who are tokophobic may go to great lengths to avoid getting pregnant, according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. They might also worry so much during pregnancy that they have difficulty eating and sleeping, or undergo an elective C-section because of their immense fear of vaginal childbirth.
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Samantha King’s tokophobia started as a teenager.
Samantha King, 35, is a travel blogger from Adelaide, Australia. In a recent interview with the Daily Mirror, she shared that her mother “put the fear of God” into her regarding pregnancy when she was a teenager.
"The fear has just grown as I've grown. The thought of being pregnant gives me the heebie-jeebies,” Samantha explained. “From what I've been told, you can feel the baby moving inside you and the whole idea of giving birth is gross and scary.”
There are other aspects of pregnancy she doesn’t like, either.
Aside from the idea of childbirth being “gross and scary,” Samantha shared other reasons procreating isn’t for her. “Your body has been changed for the rest of your life and then you get stuck with the child forever,” she told the publication. And then there’s the “whole process of being pregnant and having to deal with all the side effects, like the morning sickness and the pains.”
She could adopt or foster, but her lifestyle isn’t really conducive to it.
Although she doesn’t have any interest in carrying a pregnancy or delivering a baby, Samantha recognizes there are other methods of being a parent. "I think I could probably foster or adopt a child,” she admitted. “But the whole process of being pregnant freaks me out too much." Not to mention, Samantha’s lifestyle doesn’t make parenthood a likely option. "I work a lot and spend time with the dog, and travel when I can," she said.
Samantha is honest about her tokophobia with potential partners.
Although she is single at the moment, Samantha said she makes it a point to explain her tokophobia to romantic partners when things start to become serious. “Most have been fairly accepting as at our age they might already have children with someone else. I've only had one guy that got a little upset as he wanted children, but respected my choices and we parted ways,” she told the Daily Mirror. “I would never want to stop someone from having their own children."
She has accepted her fear likely won’t go away entirely.
Therapy is one way people struggling with tokophobia can help cope with their fears and anxiety. Still, Samantha shared she was doubtful her outlook would ever meaningfully change. "Being pregnant is a beautiful thing," she said. "A lot of women who really want to unfortunately don't have that opportunity, and there are some women that absolutely love being pregnant. I just couldn't think of anything worse."
How common is tokophobia?
According to Dr. Kay Roussos-Ross, an OB-GYN and psychiatrist, tokophobia is relatively common. “If you have tokophobia, you are not alone. Some studies estimate that as many as 1 in 20 cases of postpartum depression and anxiety may be related to tokophobia,” Dr. Roussos-Ross said in an interview for ACOG. “…And it’s not something to be ashamed of or to blame yourself for.”
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