Rosie Rivera knows what she is talking about, unfortunately. The youngest of the Rivera siblings has been open about her years of being abused by her sister Jenni Rivera's husband. But it's never been as detailed and heartfelt like in her book My Broken Pieces. In her quest to help those in a similar situation, particularly children, she tells us what you need to do if you suspect that a child is a victim of sexual–or any kind–of abuse.
Read more ¿Qué más?: Rosie Rivera + 10 other celebs that have talked openly about their marriage struggles
Image via Mezcalent
The book
In her book My Broken Pieces, Rivera tells her story as a victim of sexual abuse, the consequences for the rest of her life and her family, and how she found the strength in her Christian faith to help her recover.
The signs of a child being abused
Rosie Rivera draws from her own experience and from different counselors she has worked with. While she says that every kid is different, there are things that should get our attention.
Change of mood
A warning sign is a sudden change in disposition. "If your kid is usually happy but is suddenly in a bad mood, or sulking without a clear reason," she says.
Isolation
A kid that suddenly isolates him or herself from her usual social circle is also sign of a potential problem.
Fights certain topics
Rivera says that she used to get mad at her parents when they insisted in discussing certain topics like sex or abuse in front of them. "I would get so mad and my parents didn't understand…All my rage had a reason that I only knew," she adds.
Avoid a specific person
If your child was super fond of somebody and suddenly rejects them, shows anger, fear or just a weird indifference towards them, that is also a sign.
Terrible fears
As she writes in great detail in her book, Rivera explains that an abused child – or person- has three main fears:
1. Nobody is going to believe me
2. They will think I liked it
3. Somebody is going to die (abusers use threats to silence their victim)
A mother first needs to believe her kid
Nothing was more powerful for Rosie Rivera than her sister Jenni Rivera's reaction, when after many years, she confessed her ex-husband had been raping her. She insists that knowing that she was believed gave her the courage to pursue criminal action against Trino Marín. The man, who is also Chiquis Rivera's dad, is still in jail.
The most important thing mother can do
A mother has to "make them feel that they're ok with you. That you love them and will always protect them…For many years, I thought my sister was going to die…or that my mother was going to die of pain (by letting them know she was being abused)," Rosie Rivera says. "You should say that yes, it will hurt, but you are strong to deal with it for the sake of your child."
There should be an ongoing conversation
For Rivera, for a child to trust a parent with such a awful, scary and difficult thing means you should work on having a good relationship from the beginning. "When she is 4, sit with her to see Dora the Explorer, ask her about her friends in school, so that your daughter feels that you're interested in her things," she says.
The Rosie Rivera story
Rosie Rivera was sexually abused at the age of 8 by her sister's husband. Her journey from a self-destructive teenager to the woman that she is today is chronicled in her autobiographic book My Broken Pieces. She also vlogs and blogs on RosieRivera.com
