Verity Lovelock of Portsmouth, England says that giving birth to her son Daniel wasn't at all painful. The 33-year-old mother used a chapter in a hypnobirthing book to learn visualization and coping tools to help with pain during labor.
"I honestly didn't find my labor a painful experience. The stronger my contractions got the less they were a problem, because it was a productive feeling," she told the Daily Mail.
Seriously…?
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She continued: "Every one was a step closer to my baby. As soon as it was over I thought "when can I do it again?"
Do I believe her that the techniques she used helped her have a pleasant birth? Absolutely! Do I think all mother's could benefit from learning pain-management techniques for childbirth? Yes, yes, and yes. Then why does reading about Verity and many other mother's who have used similar techniques and say they experienced a pain-free labor make me want to puke? Because I think they are lying.
No, I don't think they are purposely lying and yes I think their techniques helped, but come on! Plucking my eyebrows hurts, or popping a pimple, and you are going to tell me that you didn't feel a smidgen of pain when your body was working on passing a human being through your little bitty lady parts?
Maybe you are not calling it pain, maybe you are calling it discomfort, or a sign that your precious bundle of joy is coming, but other people would still call it pain otherwise you wouldn't have to work so hard on your breathing or visualization or hypno-whatever.
Oh and this is coming from a crunchy, co-sleeping, extended breastfeeding, San Francisco-California-stereotypical mamá.
Yes, I truly, TRULY believe in the power of mind over matter. I truly, TRULY believe that you can surrender to a situation and make it better. I use breath to help me all the time. So kudos to all the ladies that have successfully given birth without pain medication and who enjoyed the birthing process. I believe you that it was enjoyable. I don't believe you that there was no discomfort, I'm sorry, I just don't. And some of us call that discomfort painful.
I truly am happy for all the women who have a wonderful birthing experience, but it bothers me that it is presented as if pain is a choice that all birthing mothers can opt out of simply by thinking positive, visualizing, and breathing because as consultant obstetrician Malcolm Dickson say:
While stress, fear and anxiety undeniably exacerbate pain, some women, no matter how calm they are, will still find contractions agonizing, simply because the sensation of the cervix stretching can be innately painful. Hypnobirthing won't prevent a woman tearing as she pushes her baby out either. There's also a risk that a woman will feel disappointment, even a failure, if she sets her heart on a pain-free birth and finds it's not possible. It's best to keep an open mind.
Verity Lovelock claims that right after her pain-free birth she couldn't wait to do it again. You know what? Neither one of my birthing experiences was pain-free and I was still eager to do it again.
I can however, vouch for the feeling of euphoria that comes from unmedicated birthing. My fist child was induced and born with the help of pain medication, my second came on her own with no medication and there is NO comparison. I felt like a SUPERSTAR after the birth of my second. I felt like I could run a marathon afterwards and no doubt the recovery was much faster than with my first birth. But they both hurt.
Image via Thinkstock
