Even before I got pregnant I knew I wanted to stay home with my kids as long as possible once they were born. I hated the idea of getting only a few weeks maternity leave and so my husband and I started saving so that when the time came, I'd have the option of quitting my job to afford being able to stay home.
Once I was pregnant with my daughter, I ended up not having to quit because I was laid off, which sounded worrisome at the time, but turned out to be a blessing in disguise. I got to stay home with my daughter for more than two years and I was super happy. Unfortunately, I didn't get to stay home with my son that long–only eight months–and I was truly unhappy when I had to go back to work. Well, now a study has found that when you do the opposite of what you really want to do–postpartum depression rates are much higher.
The research, conducted at Brigham Young University and published in the journal Human Relations, studied 1,110 firt-time mothers at regular points postpartum, from when they gave birth to 36 months. Sadly, it found that 71 percent of moms are not doing what they really wanted to do postpartum. In other words, many moms where either home when they wanted to be working or where working when they actually wanted to stay home. The study found that within this group, 25 percent experienced clinical depression–a much larger percentage than the 14 percent who suffered it even though they were happy with their decision (to either stay home or go back to work).
I know that, at least with my daughter, I was very lucky to do just as I wished because not everyone has the same option. Many times, mom have to go back to work even if they don't want to because of financial reasons. On the other hand, some moms want to go back to work, but their options are limited or they simply can't find a job.
Postpartum depression is a serious and challenging illness that should not be ignored. It's sad to see that the stress of having to do what you don't want to do in terms of staying at home or going back to work has such a huge influence on our emotional well-being.
Did you stay home or go back to work after you had children? How difficult was it for you to make the decision?
Image via E.Yoshio/flickr
