A post written on a South Dakota mom's blog has quickly gone viral after she criticized those she considers to be overprotective parents and called for kids that are being bullied to "toughen up." Since first publishing it three weeks ago, the piece, entitled "Why My Kids Are NOT The Center Of My World," has stirred up tons of controversy online and amassed millions of hits–despite that her blog originally only had eight followers!
Read more ¿Qué más?: It's NEVER OK to not tell the school your kids has lice!
Apparently, it all started when Stephanie Metz's son decided to bring a different object than he originally planned to show and tell, because he said the first toy could get him in trouble for too closely resembling a weapon. That decision set off the rant that has now catapulted Metz into the spotlight.
"The mentality of our society in 2013 is nauseating to me, friends," she wrote in the blog post. "How long will it be before their typical boy-ish behavior gets them suspended from school?" Metz went on to claim that parents who constantly shelter their kids and attempt to protect them at every turn are only hurting their children, not helping them.
"Dropping everything to cater to their every need is only going to lead to a very rude awakening once they enter the real world," she wrote.
To be honest, when I first started reading this post, I didn't see anything that bad about it. Of course, every person has a different parenting style, which makes it impossible to judge what's better or what's worse. But I do agree with what I believe is her general point here–which is that allowing your kid to learn some independence early on is important.
Unfortunately, the logic seems to completely disappear when she starts discussing bullying. "There was a time when kids got called names and got picked on, and they brushed it off and worked through it," she wrote, then going on to say that if a teen is called a name now, "her whole world crumbles around her, she contemplates suicide, and this society encourages her to feel like her world truly has ended." Um … did she seriously just say that?!
Metz clarified this statement (slightly) on ABC News, saying, "Understand I am not condoning kids to be cruel to each other, but I think kids need to toughen up when kids are not nice to them." Yeaaah, she's still totally lost me.
I understand wanting to prepare your children for "the real world" by teaching them to do things on their own. But telling kids who are getting taunted by their peers to "toughen up" is just plain mean, not to mention a TERRIBLE solution.
Sure, maybe it's one thing to try and get kids the age of her sons (2 and 4 years old) to stand up for themselves on the playground. But what happens when those kids enter teenagedom and that bullying enters a whole new level of cruelty? What Metz doesn't seem to be grasping is that this isn't the bullying of days past when you got called a couple names and got your lunch money stolen. Sadly these days, it can mean having your reputation slandered not only in school, but on the Internet for the whole world to see. In some cases, it can even extend to other family members! To not interfere in instances like that would be to allow your kids to suffer irreparable damage. And for Metz to say otherwise and blame the victim is not only insensitive, it's just wrong.
Personally, I think it's all about doing your best to find a middle ground. Do you have to hold your kids hands on the way to school through the 12thgrade? No. But should you be there for them when they need you? Absolutely. And I think it is possible for that to happen while still teaching your children to think for themselves. Unfortunately, it seems like many, like Metz, are only willing to go to either extreme.
Image via ABC News
