It's no secret that feeding a toddler is one of the most frustrating aspects of parenting a small child. Sometime after their first birthdays, tots begin to not only have real opinions about what and when they want something, but they also begin to impose their own will through mealtime interactions. Even kids who aren't picky at all can be difficult during meals and snacks, which makes sense since a great porportion of their waking hours are spent at a table. But dont' stress–here are six tips to end mealtime battles:
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Know your role. Ellyn Satter, a well-known dietician and author of several books on feeding children, proposes that as parents our job is to provide our children with appropriate foods and decide when they should eat, and that our kids should decide what and how much of it they actually consume. Remember, that as long as you're doing the shopping, you're still in control–kids can only choose from foods that you've already chosen for them, so you still have the upper hand. Dino nuggets aren't an issue if you never buy them.
Limit grazing. Try to set a mealtime schedule for your toddler. You can be flexible, but by being fairly consistent, he will come to trust that he will eat at regular intervals, which should limit begging between meals. Once you are in a good routine, try to limit grazing and snacking–it will help ensure that your child has a good appetite at set meal and snack times, and you'll feel confident that even if he's grumpy, true hunger is not the cause.
__Variety is key. __Strive to serve a variety of nutritious foods that are visually appealing and easy to eat. I like to offer small amounts of at least three different foods and refill my son's tray as requested. If he wasn't in the mood for grilled cheese but really enjoyed his grapes and peas, that's cool–I know he ate good food and got full, and that's all that matters. If he asks for more of the item he devoured, I let him have it.
Be okay with messes. Toddlers don't like to sit still, they don't like to wear bibs and chances are if you give them a plate they are going to dump everything. Feeding time is bound to be messy because your child is learning and experimenting, and still doesn't have the best motor skills.
Let her do it. Once you've reconciled yourself to the messiness, you'll find that you can loosen up and let your kiddo learn to feed herself. Even a 1-year-old is capable of using a fork and spoon, you just have to give him the opportunity to learn. Toddlers have a deep desire for independence and if yours isn't already fighting you over the spoon, he soon will. By helping him master self-feeding early on, he will enjoy mealtime more and be better at it later on.
Don't ever force it. If your child does not want to eat, don't make him. Doing so is likely to backfire. If you've offered a variety of foods–at least one of which you know your child loves–then you've done your job. And you know what? If he refuses to eat anything at one meal, he won't starve–he'll make up for it at his next meal or snack. Forcing can cause bad food associations and animosity, neither of which will make either of you feel any better.
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