I am in tears over here! Full-on sobs and not because I'm sad, but because I am so unbelievably touched by a letter that awesome dad Ferret Steinmetz wrote to his daughter, "Dear Daughter: I Hope You Have Awesome Sex." The letter is a sort of reaction to something going around the internet called, "10 Rules for Dating my Daughter", which is full of "funny" threats to any potential suitors. Steinmetz is not that kind of dad though, the letter he writes to his daughter is so much more interesting than the usual stereotypical "beware of sex advice" and "I will kick anyone's butt who tries to come near you" father stances that we're used to.
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He writes to his daughter like she is a person and not a posesion to be protected. He's honest about sex. He explains that he likes sex and that because he loves his daughter he wants her to enjoy the same pleasures and more than he has in his life. Of course he doesn't want the details, just as much as his daughter wouldn't want the details of his sex life, but he says:
…Consensual sex isn't something that men take from you; it's something you give. It doesn't lessen you to give someone else pleasure. It doesn't degrade you to have some of your own. And anyone who implies otherwise is a man who probably thinks very poorly of women underneath the surface.
I love this man. I wish he were my dad. I wish someone had given me the type of perspective that he gives his daughter. I wish someone had shared with me words like his. He continues:
Now, you're going to get bruised by life, and sometimes bruised consensually. But I won't tell you sex is bad, or that you're bad for wanting it, or that other people are bad from wanting it from you if you're willing to give it. I refuse to perpetuate, even through the plausible deniability of humor, the idea that the people my daughter is attracted to are my enemy.
What a good man and what a GREAT father.
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