One of the things I remember most about my childhood are the constant nightmares I used to have. They actually never stopped–ever–but now I deal with them on my own, instead of waking up my parents.
Nightmares are pretty common in childhood as all Moms know. In any normal household, aside from making for a restless night's sleep for everyone, the occasional nightmare is not a cause for concern–but not with me. I hate my daughter's nightmares even more than I ever hated mine.
When my 6-year-old Juliana has nightmares I get so upset that I cannot go back to sleep myself. I can't stop obsessing about what on earth is causing these terrible bad dreams. My heart starts racing from the moment I hear her first scream or sign of suffering and it doesn't stop until the next morning (or even afternoon sometimes).
There's no proven way to prevent the occasional nightmare either, which makes me feel even more impotent. I'm very good at avoiding scary books or movies before sleep, I even have a peaceful bedtime routine–we pray at night and ask our Angelito de la Guarda for good dreams, we use a nightlight and they sleep with the bedroom door open. I really don't know what else to do!
I've been reading about the subject but I haven't found anything new. Recurring nightmares may signal fear or anxiety worth exploring through discussions with your child, and I don't know if we are at that level of "worrying" (well, I am, but the situation certainly isn't) and Juliana never remembers what her bad dreams were about anyway, so she hates talking about the subject.
Nightmares are often a reflection of a child's current fears and challenges, just in the same manner as our adult dreams are often about stresses or fears in our lives. So I am trying to explore further how to help my little girl and myself too while I'm at it, since I might give myself a heart attack if I continue jumping out of bed like that and running like a crazy Fireman.
The other night she had recurring nightmares. It was the worst it has ever been. So the next day I talked to her about her fears (which she couldn't pin down) and I explained that there was zero reason to be scared of anything.
That night she called me into her room and said to me that she was very hot, so I asked her why she turned her fan off.
And she told me: "I have the feeling that the fan blows my good dreams away."
The fact that this little girl can articulate that sentence blows my mind, I know I sound like a ridiculous proud Mom but I can't help myself.
I responded that I really didn't think that the fan would blow her good dreams away, but she sad: "I promise you it does, I start placing all the little things that I like in my head and when that fan starts blowing air, they all go away."
I explain to her that the heat will only make it worse and I promise her to help her keep the "good things" in their place even after we turn on the fan.
She reconsidered for two minutes and let me turn the fan on again. Then we did an exercise to make sure that the good stuff is still hanging in there and wouldn't get blown away.
Later, she fell asleep and there were no nightmares. I, on the other hand, spent many hours on guard. I didn't want to turn my own fan on, since I was afraid the noise would block out my daughter if she screamed.
I almost died from the heat.
The next morning, as I watched my daughter laugh and have a great time, I realized how hard life could become for my little girl thanks to her crazy Mom genes.
But if that isn't life… I don't know what is.
Image via Thinkstock
