When I was pregnant with my first child, I knew there were certain things I'd be doing once my baby was born. Breastfeeding and using cloth diapers were some of them. Co-sleeping was not. Even with all the benefits that co-sleepers would try to cram down my throat, I just couldn't see the benefit this would have on my relationship with my husband.
Anybody who has children can attest to the fact that even a super strong relationship will be rocked by the birth of a child. Add to that not having any "us" time whatsoever– because, at the beginning, that's how it is no matter whether you co-sleep or not–and the stress levels can shoot through the roof!
I love sleeping and although I was naive about a lot of things before I became a mom, this was an area I knew would be changing forever once I had children. I always knew I wanted to do whatever was in my power to help them sleep through the night and in their own rooms as early as possible. That way, everyone would get as good a night's sleep as possible and be decent human beings the next morning.
Well, I guess I succeeded because I either got really lucky or because I stuck to my guns.
Both our children slept in our room in a cradle next to my side of the bed for the first few months of their lives. I breastfed both of them and, at the beginning, it was just convenient. But as soon as they turned 4 months–ok, my son was only 3–they were out of our room and in their cribs. It wasn't easy, there was a lot of crying the first few nights, but we all survived and they've been sleeping through the night ever since. (Ok, with one late night feeding until they were about 6 months old).
I just can't imagine it any other way. Although getting sleep was a high priority, I've also been a night owl all of my life. Bedtime usually means reading time or just winding down time for me. It's when my husband and I get to talk about our days, stuff we need to get done around the house, things the kids did or said and just all kinds of conversations and discussions. Not to mention lovemaking.
And that's probably one of the things I'll never understand about those who co-sleep. When and where do you have sex? Well according to my friends who co-sleep, "you just find other places to do it." To which I always answer, "Are you freaking kidding me?"
I know parenting is full of sacrifices, but this is one area where I don't really think this applies. At least not in my life. At the end of the day, nothing makes me happier than closing the doors to my children's bedrooms and spending a few hours not being a mom.
Check out this pretty cool debate going on over at The Huffington Post about this very topic!
What do you think? Do you co-sleep? Why?
Image via Lau_chan/flickr
