As your kids approach their teens and grow more and more independent, it can be a challenge to find common ground. But when your kiddos no longer want to play on the swingset and cuddle on the couch with you, it doesn't mean that they no longer need your influence. The challenge is to find a way to reestablish yourself as not just an authority figure, but as a mentor and source of inspiration.
A fun and productive way to do just that is to take on a project together, one that involves setting goals and working together to reach them. Getting and staying healthy fits the bill perfectly.
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By not only encouraging your children to be active, but by joining in the challenge, you'll add a new dimension to your relationship with your children and create lots of opportunity for quality bonding time. Here are six ways being active together as a family can help you bond with your kids:
1. Quality time. If you and your child decide that you'll walk or bike together for 30 minutes three times a week, that's a guaranteed hour and a half that you will spend together. Not only will it be time side by side, but if you agree to make it gadget-free, it will be time without distractions from Facebook, TV and iPod. Time that you can use to really get to know each other.
2. Opportunity for discourse. The time you spend together being active can serve double-duty purposes if you let it. Engage your kids in conversation. Ask them about their day, who they've been hanging out with lately, what their new favorite foods are. Anything, really. Just verbally showing some interest in who they are will give them an opportunity to open up to you.
3. Mentoring. Let your child be a part of setting your fitness goals and deciding how to achieve them, then take the lead. When he sees how capable you are, not just at preparing meals, doing laundry and washing dishes, but at things that he is actually interested in, he will begin to look up to you in a new way. Soon, he'll likely be looking to you for leadership in other aspects of his day-to-day life as well.
4. Working together. You know how each time you have to work with the same group of co-workers to get a project done, you get better at doing it? The same idea can be applied to your family life. The more time you spend problem-solving together, the easier and more rewarding it will become. You may have some spats along the way, but stick with it, and you will all be the better for it.
5. Celebrating milestones. And of course, once you hit your stride and actually start making some progress toward the goals you've set as a family, you'll have reason to celebrate. And celebrations typically result in the fondest of memories.
6. Goal achievement. Achieving goals is an amazing feeling, and when you set goals with your family you get to experience that awesomeness together. Your daughter will never forget that she broke an eight-minute mile while on a run with mom. She will remember that you motivated her, supported her and taught her, and will cherish your relationship all the more for it.
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