There is the way that things should be and then there is the way that things really are. For example if you have more than one child, then you should feel the same way about all of your children and love and like them all equally, but in reality as much as you deny it, you do have a favorite child even if it is only on occasion. Why? Because you are human and so are your kids. It's normal to have an affinity for one child. I get it. It could be a personality thing, a behavior thing, a you are a human being and flawed kinda thing. You might also have a different favorite child depending on the situation. I joke that my favorite child is whichever one is behaving the best at any given moment and it's kind of true.
So fine, go on and notice that you have a favorite and then do everything within your power to check your preference. And never ever reveal which child is your favorite. Take that secret to the grave with you.
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Here are seven reasons why it's not okay to let your kids know you have a favorite child in words or in actions:
1. Because no child in the world wants to know that they are not the favorite one.
2. Because you are pitting your kids against each other.
3. Because your issues are your issues and not your kids', so don't pass them on.
4. Because a bias is a bias is a bias and baby, you are biased.
5. Because your likes and dislikes say more about you than they do about what it is you like and dislike.
6. Because it's personal and there is no way for your children not to take it personally.
7. Because if you focus on the love more than the like you realize that, really, you love all of your kids INFINITELY.
You know, the funny thing is that growing up, I always knew that my mother's favorite was my brother, but if you ask him about it, he swears that I have always been my mother's favorite. She won't tell us which one of us is right and I'm glad because really I don't need or want to know.
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