Kids who get trophies for nothing or for losing will grow up being lazy and expect to be rewarded for every dang failure and the only people benefitting are the trophy makers, yeah those freakin' trophy manufacturers are cashing in on our softie parenting and child-rearing, they are laughing all the way to the bank at our expense and the kids who actually win are too stupid to figure out that they won because they can't figure out that their trophy is a winning trophy and the loser trophy is just a "thanks for participating" trophy. So let's do away with all this useless trophy giving.
If a kid is on a losing baseball team, don't give them a trophy, don't take them out for an end of the season celebratory dinner. Instead let them know that they are losers and losers get NOTHING! Not a "well done," not a "better luck next time," not a "great improvement," just a "too bad you suck." RELAX, I don't really believe these things, but a majority of people do and I have PROOF!
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A recent poll found that a majority of people think that only kids who actually win at something should get trophies. I find this so ridiculous hence my ridiculous tirade above. I was being sarcastic. Let's give kids some credit here and realize that they have functioning brains and can understand the difference between getting a trophy for "winning" and getting a trophy just to commemorate and celebrate their participation. They aren't idiots after all.
But fine, if you don't agree with me, let's take trophies away from losers AND let's not end it there! Here are five other mean things we should be doing to kids:
1. When they are learning to walk and keep falling, we should point and laugh and tell them that they are not winning at the walking game.
2. If they don't get the top score in their class on any test, we need to remind them that they are not the best therefor they are LOSERS!
3. If they draw and you can't figure out what the heck it is you should let them know that their artistic efforts are pointless and they should not be wasting your time trying to get you to look at their "art," which is really just a bunch of scribbles and you can call the scribbles a bunny rabbit, but COME ON!
4. If they are potty training and wet their bed at night, we should make them sleep in their soiled clothes and sheets. That'll teach them!
5. We need to point out their failings and point them out often. How else will they get better?
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