____Did you get the sex of baby you wanted when you got pregnant? When I was pregnant, I definitely wanted a baby girl. It may have had something to do with the fact that from the moment I got pregnant, I felt super feminine. It was probably the hormones and maybe a small part of me just really wanted a little girl but really, all I ever wanted was a healthy baby.
We didn't get pregnant until we had been married for five years. It wasn't so much a fertility thing as a "I'm not quite ready" thing. We were planning to plan and it happened. When we found out it was girl, we were thrilled. For me, it was the chance to have a sweet little girl to love and for my husband … well, the moment he held her, I knew I became number two. So, it completely blows my mind when I hear people complain that they didn't get the sex baby they "wanted."
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Really, is this the kind of shit we say out loud now? I've known mothers who were literally overcome with grief because they found out they were having a boy and wanted a girl or vice versa. Hey, I'm not saying you can't have your feelings. We are all entitled to wanting what we want but there are just some things that you never say out loud, like that your kid is ugly or you wanted the opposite sex. It's taboo and just plain mean. Kids eventually grow up and that kind of stuff could come back and bite you square on your mean ass.
Just a few weeks ago, we had our neighborhood garage sale and I was selling some of my daughters' clothes that they have outgrown. Not one, but TWO women walked up and told me how cute the clothes but they only had boys, though they really wanted girls. One woman, with tears in her eyes, in front of her husband, told me how she had prayed for a little girl but "unfortunately" got "another" boy. Yikes. My mouth was open and my jaw was on the floor.
I just need to say that it is messed the eff up that people are so blatant in their disappointment in having one sex or the other. I also think it is awful when families put pressure on a couple to have a boy "to carry on the family name" and then vocalize their disappointment to the couple putting a damper on their happiness. Come on people, a baby is a baby and can't we all just hope it's healthy and happy?
If you don't have anything nice to say or you can't be happy it's the sex it is, then just keep your opinion to yourself. There are women all over the world who would be happy and honored to have the boy or girl that you "unfortunately" got. To be so disappointed in the face of so many who have fertility issues or have lost babies is ridiculous. Just be happy you have a baby at all. Love it. That is all.
Image via Nanagyei/Flickr
